Bush-wacked

George Bush goes to a primary school to give a speech. After his talk
he offers question time.One little boy puts up his hand and George asks
himwhat his name is.

"Bob".

"And what is your question, Bob?"

"I have 3 questions.

First, Why did the USA invade Iraq without the support of the UN?

Second, Why are you President when Kerry got more votes?

And third, What happened to Osama Bin Laden?

Just then the bell rings for recess. George Bush informs the kiddies
that they will continue after recess.When they resume George says, "OK,
where were we? Oh that's right --- question time. Who has a question?"

A different little boy puts up his hand . George points him out and
asks him
what his name is.
"Steve"

"And what is your question, Steve?"

"I have 5 questions.

First, Why did the USA invade Iraq without the support of the UN?

Second, Why are you President when Kerry got more votes?

Third, What happened to Osama Bin Laden?

Fourth, Why did the recess bell go 20 minutes early?!

And fifth, Where is "Bob"? !!
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Things You Would Never Know Without the Movies.

- It is always possible to park directly outside any building you are visiting.

- A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.

- If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps.

- Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communication systems of any invading alien civilization.

- It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts - your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.

- When a person is knocked unconscious by a blow to the head, they will never suffer a concussion or brain damage.

- No one involved in a car chase, hijacking, explosion, volcanic eruption or alien invasion will ever go into shock.

- Police Departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are deliberately assigned a partner who is their total opposite.

- When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other.

- You can always find a chainsaw when you need one.

- Any lock can be picked by a credit card or a paper clip in seconds, unless it's the door to a burning building with a child trapped inside.

- An electric fence, powerful enough to kill a dinosaur will cause no lasting damage to an eight year old child.

- Television news bulletins usually contain a story that affects you personally at that precise moment you turn the television on.

How Business is Done

Father : I want you to marry a girl of my choice
Son : "I will choose my own bride!"
Father: "But the girl is Bill Gates's daughter."
Son : "Well, in that case...ok"

Next Father approaches Bill Gates.

Father: "I have a husband for your daughter."
Bill Gates: "But my daughter is too young to marry!"
Father: "But this young man is a vice-president of the World Bank."
Bill Gates: "Ah, in that case...ok"

Finally Father goes to see the president of the World Bank.

Father: "I have a young man to be recommended as a vice-president."
President: "But I already have more vice- presidents than I need!"
Father: "But this young man is Bill Gates's son-in-law."
President: "Ah, in that case...ok"

This is how business is done!!

Llllloooogggiiicc

Bholaji decided to write the MBA exam. He could understand every thing except for the LOGIC part. One day when he was reading, Pyarelal came home.

Pyarelal: Bholaji How is your MBA preparation?
Bholaji: Every thing is fine, but I could not understand Logic.

Pyarelal: Logic is very easy.
Bholaji: Can you give me an example, so that I can understand.

Pyarelal: OK. Do you have fish pot in your house?
Bholaji: YES.

Pyarelal: Logically, there will be water in it.
Bholaji: YES.

Pyarelal: Logically, there will be fish in it.
Bholaji: YES.

Pyarelal: Logically, someone will be feeding the fish.
Bholaji: YES.

Pyarelal: I take a guess that your wife will be feeding the fish.
Bholaji: YES.

Pyarelal: so, logically, your are married.
Bholaji: YES.

Pyarelal: So, that means U are a heterosexual.

Bholaji was very glad and he understood logic. Next day he sees Herolal and he was also preparing for MBA.

Bholaji: How is your MBA preparation?
Herolal: Everything is fine except for the logic.

Bholaji: Oh, logic is easy.
Herolal: Please, give me an example.

Bholaji: Do you have a fish pot in your house?
Herolal: NO, I don't.
.
.
.
Bholaji: Saala HOMO!!!

Lalllllooooooo

After completing a jigsaw puzzle he had been working on for quite some time, Laloo proudly shows off his puzzle to a friend.

"It took me only 5 months to do it," Laloo brags

"Five months? That's too long", the friend exclaims.

"You are a fool, " Laloo replies " See this Carton, it is written, for 4 - 7 years"